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Monday, December 14, 2009
Walking Alone
" I wish I could feel my toes," Addy thought to herself as she marched through the snow on Main Street. "I'm almost there, and when I get there, everything will be better. My numb toes are a small price to pay for what I am about to do."
Her mind wandered outlining the conversation she was about to have. Her heart was racing, but that could have been caused by the walking, or the cold. It was the pit in her throat that ensured her of her overwhelming anxiety that boiled as she ran over in her mind the different outcomes of the conversation she was about to have.
The street lights created a sparkle wonderland beneath her feet as she continued. She walked with her hands in her pockets, head bowed down staring at the ground just thinking.
"I could just say it, blurt it out and wait for a reaction," she thought, "that would be the easiest way, just get it over with."
That thought however, made the anxiety rise. She knew in her heart that she would be supported, but what if she wasn't? What if this would end a part of her life that has been so great? Addy's fear was justified, she knew the rules she had been raised by. This was different though, her life's lessons were contradicting themselves. No matter what she decided to do, it would be going against something that she was taught. A value that she knew was important and something she believed. If only she hadn't got herself into this situation to begin with.
Addy glanced up and saw a red pick-up outside the white house on the corner.
"He beat me here," Addy's mind was racing, "well I guess then I know what I have to do.
As she walked closer to that white house on the corner, memories of her childhood drove through her head. Swinging on the swings in the backyard as her daddy pushed her. Her mama setting a pitcher of lemonade and some cookies on the picnic table. It was a storybook childhood and she now sat in a real world situation.
Addy walked up the greyed wooded steps on her parents front porch. Before she place her hand on the door, she stopped and took a deep breath.
"You can do this Addy," she tried to convince her self. "God, please, help me do this," she prayed, hoping the next thirty seconds didn't result in her world tumbling down. For the first time in her 17 years, she was about to do the hardest thing she's ever had to do.
Addy grasped the cold bronze door knob, her hands so numb she barely felt it. As she pushed open the door, the warmth of the house greeted her face like a hug, the smell of home filled her.
She walked into the family room to find her mom, dad, and boyfriend Dan playing a rather intense game of Scrabble. They looked up and smiled.
"Hi baby," Dan said, "I got off early, so I thought I'd come hang out with your family and wait for you here."
"Yes, sweetheart," Addy's Dad interrupted, "What did you want to tell us? Everything ok with my little girl?
Addy's heart pounded so hard, her head rushed, her face flushed, it was as if her emotional volcano erupted. Her eyes, filled with tears. Her hands trembling, she slowly opened her mouth and very quietly, with a soft, trembling voice uttered the words she had rehearsed for the past 3 days over and over.
"I'm pregnant."
Her mind wandered outlining the conversation she was about to have. Her heart was racing, but that could have been caused by the walking, or the cold. It was the pit in her throat that ensured her of her overwhelming anxiety that boiled as she ran over in her mind the different outcomes of the conversation she was about to have.
The street lights created a sparkle wonderland beneath her feet as she continued. She walked with her hands in her pockets, head bowed down staring at the ground just thinking.
"I could just say it, blurt it out and wait for a reaction," she thought, "that would be the easiest way, just get it over with."
That thought however, made the anxiety rise. She knew in her heart that she would be supported, but what if she wasn't? What if this would end a part of her life that has been so great? Addy's fear was justified, she knew the rules she had been raised by. This was different though, her life's lessons were contradicting themselves. No matter what she decided to do, it would be going against something that she was taught. A value that she knew was important and something she believed. If only she hadn't got herself into this situation to begin with.
Addy glanced up and saw a red pick-up outside the white house on the corner.
"He beat me here," Addy's mind was racing, "well I guess then I know what I have to do.
As she walked closer to that white house on the corner, memories of her childhood drove through her head. Swinging on the swings in the backyard as her daddy pushed her. Her mama setting a pitcher of lemonade and some cookies on the picnic table. It was a storybook childhood and she now sat in a real world situation.
Addy walked up the greyed wooded steps on her parents front porch. Before she place her hand on the door, she stopped and took a deep breath.
"You can do this Addy," she tried to convince her self. "God, please, help me do this," she prayed, hoping the next thirty seconds didn't result in her world tumbling down. For the first time in her 17 years, she was about to do the hardest thing she's ever had to do.
Addy grasped the cold bronze door knob, her hands so numb she barely felt it. As she pushed open the door, the warmth of the house greeted her face like a hug, the smell of home filled her.
She walked into the family room to find her mom, dad, and boyfriend Dan playing a rather intense game of Scrabble. They looked up and smiled.
"Hi baby," Dan said, "I got off early, so I thought I'd come hang out with your family and wait for you here."
"Yes, sweetheart," Addy's Dad interrupted, "What did you want to tell us? Everything ok with my little girl?
Addy's heart pounded so hard, her head rushed, her face flushed, it was as if her emotional volcano erupted. Her eyes, filled with tears. Her hands trembling, she slowly opened her mouth and very quietly, with a soft, trembling voice uttered the words she had rehearsed for the past 3 days over and over.
"I'm pregnant."
Revision Excersize Notes
I had my sister cut up my story and paste it back together. It was a weird experience for me because it gave me ideas on how to spilt up my back story. I originally new that I had too much back story like we have talked about in the boards for a while, but how to split it up was hard for me the fathom. For example, one of the places in the story that was eye opening was when Paul was on the plane to Turkey. Right after he falls asleep it jumps to Jo and Paul talking for hours in the car on the ride home from school. That got me thinking that Paul could dream a back memory and split some of the back story up. I also realized that in cutting up the story there were only two sections that even mention Paul's brother, and those sections really add nothing. HE dies at the end so I figured he should probably be more developed as a character. Therefore, in my revision you'll see he has a bigger place in the story.
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